'film' Action movies at their worst
Walter Shawlee 3.0, Associate Staff Writer

Movies generally fall into three basic categories: good, bad and action. Good movies have redeeming qualities, such as plot, character development and good cinematography. Bad movies do not usually have these traits, and if they do, it is in modest amounts. Action movies are a category all their own because they are usually bad by default but are occasionally entertaining. What makes an action movie good is the use of a believable, or at least coherent, story arc. Generally, the actions performed by the main characters make some sort of sense; "Gurk must shoot bad guy." They are simple movies with eye candy, though once in a great while there comes along an action movie that is really brilliant; it would almost qualify as a good movie were it not for all the explosions. The Transporter, the latest offering from Luc Besson, does not come anywhere near being a good movie, and it barely manages to be a good action movie.

While Luc Besson did not direct this stinking heap, he did write it. Director's credits go to Corey Yuen, a well-known Hong Kong action movie director. I expected a good story and solid character development from the same man that brought us The Professional (known in France as Leon), La Femme Nikita, and The 5th Element. Besson has a track record of making visually stunning, quality films. Oh how easy it is to ruin a reputation. With The Transporter, Besson felt that it was important to substitute fast paced martial arts for plausible characters.

The opening sequence featured an absolutely stunning car chase, and did a very nice lead-in to the possible character development of the main character (Jason Statham). Unfortunately, this is an action movie, and character development went only as far as to introduce the players. There were, however, several cleverly shot fight sequences. One of these sequences was Statham's duel with an armada of villains while standing on an oil slick. Naturally the hero has to think up a slightly ridiculous, yet completely plausible, method for not slipping on the oil. The result was a fistfight with Statham clamping bike pedals to his shoes for added traction. I would like to take this chance to point out that not one of the villains pulled out a gun and shot the dozy bloke, but instead opted for the more traditional "hands on" approach. Naturally they got their asses kicked.

The Transporter combines decent action with a mediocre story to produce a very average film. It uses a barrage of old clichés, like the obvious bad guy that cannot be trusted, and the well-intentioned, yet somewhat deceitful, lonely young woman. The Transporter makes a good rental; it is almost completely saturated with action sequences with just enough of that "mushy" stuff (sometimes referred to as plot) to make it watchable. Seeing it in the theatre will cause you to stare longingly at your watch. This allows you to time when all the meaningless action clichés are used. For instance, it was about an hour and five minutes into the film when the hero and heroine had unprovoked and pointless sex, and only one hour before the slow-motion jumping-away-from-the-fiery-explosion sequence occurred.

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